I am not a morning creature. So why, why under god in heaven am I awake at stupid-o-clock??? I'll tell you why! I surfaced to the land of the living at the crack of dawn, as I am wont to do since the Army permanently fucked me up. But since I no longer have to crawl out of bed at such an ungodly hour to march across the drill square or oil any rifles I usually just roll over and go back to sleep. However, today my brain decided to screw me over. I lay there, wide awake, wracking my grey matter in an attempt to remember the name of the lead vocalist of Good Charlotte. Why???? I don't bloody know! All I know is that I couldn't get back to sleep until I remembered, so I lay there eyeballing the ceiling thinking "James? Jake? Jack? John?" until I surrendered and got out of bed.
His name is Joel by the way. In case you were wondering. And now that I have recalled this snippet of useless information I am as awake as a caffeinated meerkat and utterly peturbed!
And the sun is smiling and the birds are singing and GAAAAAAA!!!!! Only a creature of utmost evil is cheerful this early in the morning! Now excuse me while I go and strangle the bluebirds chippering in my garden. Die, feathered agents of satan! DIE!
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