Oooommmmmmmmmmmmmm

Careful kiddies, I've got my zen hat on and I'm feeling indulgent...

For your pleasure, a story from the archives of the Ninth Tier:

Long ago there was a stone mason who spent each and every day in the basking heat, chipping away at the base of a mountain for stone. On one particularly hot day, the stone mason returned from his labours to find a procession of finely dressed strangers passing through his village. In the middle of the throng was a wealthy man, langurously seated upon a golden seat, carried along by his servants.

The stone mason wished with all of his heart that he were the man on the golden seat, then he wouldn't have to slave away each day to make ends meat.

To his surprise, his wish was granted. He suddenly found himself draped over soft cushions, sat upon a gilded chair, carried along by his numerous servants. He was incredibly happy, but the sun crept higher and higher in the sky, and the man grew hotter and hotter. Eventually he could take it no more. He stared up into the sky and wished he was the sun, then he would be the one to shine down on everyone, and the world would worship him.

His second wish was granted. He suddenly found himself high in the sky, burning brightly upon the world. Without him there could be no life upon the world below, and he felt infinitely important and adored by all. But without warning, great clouds floated before him, casting a shadow over the world and hiding him. He became angry that he had been outdone by a cloud, and so he wished that he were a cloud, then he could float anywhere in the sky, and he could choose whether the sun would shine on the world or not.

His wish was granted, and suddenly he was a great cloud, traversing the sky as though he owned it. He cast a huge shadow on the ground beneath him, and he was happy. But before he knew what was happening he was moving against his will. A gust of wind was blowing him far away, and there was nothing he could do about it. He felt completely poweless against the wind.

He wished he were the wind. Then he would truly be able to go wherever he wished, and he could choose to uproot and move anything he desired. His wish was granted, and he became the wind. He found that he could move with great speed across the sky. He could be a light breeze, or a terrifying hurricane. But suddenly he came up against something he could not move. Something massive and solid blocked his path through the sky and he was unable to move it. When he looked at what was barring his way he found that it was a mountain.

He wished that he were a mountain, nothing would be able to move or hurt him. He'd be a strong, invincible presence; unmoveable and eternal. His wish was granted, and he became a mountain. He felt completely secure, knowing that he stood tall above everything else in the world. But suddenly he felt a sharp pain in the stone he was made of, somewhere far far below. What could make something so huge and indestructable feel pain? Something far more powerful than a mountian surely. So he wished to be the source of this pain, then he truly would be the most powerful presence on earth.

His wish was granted, and he was once a gain a stone mason.

See, I can be deep when I want. I was feeling philosophical.... meh, I was bored.

If you don't get the moral of the story, may god have mercy on your soul, and no cookies for you.